I hate my job
January 20, 2009
Burnout used to be so much easier to handle. Getting things done, meeting deadlines, juggling a hundred different conversations, everything that is involved in navigating the modern workplace. It was stressful yes, and we would complain. But it is different now.
The GFC knocked the economic world off its axis and has taken us with it. The office now seems gripped by a collective shock-induced psychosis. It seems every conversation is infused with a frantic exploration of each persons depth of fear: What now? How bad will it be? How are things at your place?
To add to all this, it the work itself has turned from positive, productive future building to anxious, defensive plays: postponing projects, checking balance sheets, calling creditors, shoring up what might be left of the strategies that were going to take the company to the next level but are now full of holes.
It is, in short, depressing. Literally. Read more
What just happened?
December 6, 2008
An editted version of this article appeared in the December issue of Boss magazine:
What Just Happened?
Accept, for arguments sake, that the Global Financial Crisis is an epoch-shifting event.
Ignore the view that it is just the latest in a long line of economic crises – according to one recent study, it is the 149th crisis in which a country’s GDP plummeted by 10% or more since 1870 – that will continue, and are, in fact, integral to the progress of capitalism. Ignore the fact that two-third of recessions in the last hundred and fifty years have lasted less than 1 year.
Don’t compare it to the events of the last decade or so, the Asian financial crisis, LTCM, the Russian default, the bursting of the dotcom bubble, Argentina, 911, all of which were seen as huge epoch-changing shifts in global capitalism at the time, all of which have faded from memory much faster than anticipated.
Accept, instead, that this is a huge dislocation, an earthquake that has cracked the landscape apart so the freeway of progress must take a different route. Imagine that the wholesale socialisation of finance across the US and Europe will be more than a short-term detour, but a more permanent redirection. Accept that the financial markets will be utterly transformed, that trust between counterparties will need to be rebuilt using new and yet-to-be-invented structures, that the way we do business in the future will be different to that of the past.
If that’s the case, and there is no saying it isn’t, what ideas will we be using to build the new world, and who are their most articulate proponents in the English-speaking world today?
The inevitable rightsizing speech
December 3, 2008
If only because my short-term memory is poor, I remember the day as if it were yesterday. It was 1994, or thereabouts, and Cartwright, divisional CEO was giving a speech.
“We are not responsible for your career,” said Cartwright. “Only you are responsible for your employability.”
“We are moving into an era when companies will be more flexible with how they employ people, when fast moving technologies and markets may make particular jobs redundant overnight. To deny that this is going to happen would be folly. But that doesn’t mean you are on your own. The company will do its part. We will provide you with training and opportunities. We will do our best to make the decisions that ensure that there is a market for the product you produce. But at the end of the day it is up to you to ensure that you remain employable. The skills that companies need are changing all the time, and it is up to you to ensure that you are equipped with them.”
Read more
The Ballad of Barry the Rainmaker
November 13, 2008
Did you hear about poor Barry? He ain’t makin’ rain no more,
Cause the deal flow went and dried up like a Murray-Darling bore.
He was legendary, Barry, wide and deep was his renown,
For decades now he’s moved and shook and really lunched this town.
As a salesman he was priceless, indeed, he had no peer,
When he got his clients on the phone, their hearts would seize in fear.
For they knew that by the end of week, he’d seal it with a beverage;
They’d be hung and tied and buried deep, all financed via leverage.
Global Financial meltdown trivia quiz
October 2, 2008
Here’s a quiz I wrote for a business school party last week.
The first person to send me a set of complete answers (they don’t have to be all right…just mostly) will receive a signed copy of Can You Trust the Media?
Global Financial Meltdown Special edition trivia quiz
- To whom is the phrase: “A billion here, a billion there, pretty soon you’re talking real money” popularly attributed?
- KfW has become known as Germany’s dumbest bank. Why? For an extra point, what are the names of the executives who have been suspended?
- Alan Greenspan was a disciple of which philosopher and novelist?
- The following advertisement appeared in last weekend’s Financial Times:
“London Mansion for Sale, Kensington/Knightsbridge. 20,000 square foot, twelve bedrooms, all ensuite plus various staff accommodation. Indoor swimming pool/leisure. Beautifully landscaped garden. Internal garaging for 6/8 cars. ABSOLUTELY NO AGENTS, Private sell only.”
Offers in excess of what? To the closest million pounds, please.
5. According to a survey by Sheraton Hotels & Resorts, what percentage of blackberry users would choose their PDA over their spouse if they absolutely had to live without one or the other?
What percentage of blackberry users sneak a peak in the middle of the night?
6. In the 1980s financial services share of corporate profits was 10%. What was it in 2007?
7. A four part question on Lehman Brothers:
(a) To the nearest $10 million, what was Richard Fuld’s aggregate remuneration between 1993 – 2007?
(b) How old was independent financial house Lehman Brothers
(c) What was Lehman Brothers debt:capital ratio when it fell over?
(d) How much are Lehman Brothers Bondholders likely to lose, in billions of dollars?
8. Fill in the blanks (2 points for 100% correct)
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Bankrupt/capital constrained entity |
Bailout partner |
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Lehman Brothers |
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AIG |
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Fannie Mae |
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Freddie Mac |
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Merrill Lynch |
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Northern Rock |
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HBOS |
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Bear Stearns |
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US taxpayer |
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9. In which year did these recent financial crises begin? (0.25 points each)
Argentina____________________________
Mexico______________________________
Russia______________________________
Chile________________________________
East Asia____________________________
Black Monday_________________________
US Savings & Loan_____________________
Sweden______________________________
10. Sarah knows all the steps for field dressing a moose. But she’s got them all mixed up! Help her sort her life out by numbering the steps first to last. (4 points for 100% correct)
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Remove the Neck and Chest Cavity Organs |
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Split the Pelvic Bone |
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Clear Your Working Area |
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Free the Anus and Bladder |
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Clean the Body Cavity |
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Prepare the Carcass for Cooling or Quartering |
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Open the Abdomen to the Anus |
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Roll Out The Abdominal Organs with Anus Attached |
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Cut the Diaphragm from the Cavity Wall |
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Sever the Wind Pipe and Gullet from the Head |
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Break the Breastbone |
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Preparatory Skin Cuts, Throat to Anus |
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Bleed The Animal |
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What to watch on the web
September 8, 2008
Business television is designed to be wallpaper for trading floors, receptions and offices. It’s not meant to be watched and listened to. That’s why it’s got those annoying tickers running along the sides and bottoms, and you rarely see anything other than a talking head, the cheapest form of programming.
The same is true of the much of the flood of business video content available on the web. Most company results announcements are now available in webcast, CEO interviews by the score, talking heads of every shape and ugliness opining on the direction of interest rates, the oil price, Obama’s impact on the yield curve, you name it.
The problem for web video is that it is stuck between the sit forward, active viewing of computer users, and the sit back and receive viewing mode of television watchers. People who stumble upon online video content often aren’t really expecting anything specific, so when they inevitably don’t get it, they click off quickly.
Its low value, media bulimia stuff, which means that any means of differentiation or way of keeping people coming back should quickly garner value as people get more used to watching and navigating content online, broadband speeds get faster, and mobile devices become more watchable. Read more
Greenspan, etc.
July 31, 2008
This from Justin Wood:
I agree that Greenspan caused the credit crunch, and Bernanke is laying the foundations for further crises. Monetary policy is pretty much too loose everywhere in the world. I think the biggest fallout from the crisis will be a wholesale change in the way that central banks operate, what they focus on and target and how they act. Asset prices will no longer be ignored. Not all deflation will be considered bad. Monetary aggregates will once again be taken notice of. etc etc. Or maybe I’m just being overly optimistic.
If that’s being overly optimistic…I’m staying home for the pessimistic part of the lecture.
Leadership lagging as crunchtime cometh
July 29, 2008
The share market loses $25 billion because the price of iron ore slumps from stratospheric to extortionate. The government is under siege over carbon, the very issue it was elected to tackle. Fear is everywhere. More people I know have declared themselves suffering from chronic depression in the last twelve months than in the other 38 years of my life. Alan Jones has prostate cancer. John Howard gets burgled.
Is it me or are things weird at the moment?
